Lord, sometimes I feel depressed and want to cry and want everyone to leave me alone.
I lift that up to you.
I can hardly hear You.
I feel like I can't hear you!!
I am tired of feeling like I am not important.
And yet I don't understand these feelings because I know I have so many blessings in my life.
Ever feel like that??
I have.
God is not a God of hopelessness.
Even if He does not change a situation,
He can change us.
This is most certainly true.
"He who is kind to the poor,
lends to the Lord, and He will reward him for what he has done." Proverbs 19:17
Being kind and loving without reservation does seem to make moments sweeter for people in the middle
of a crisis.
Lord, I could use some kindness.
I am tired Lord.
Yet I feel like a spoiled brat because I have so much.
Sometimes people hurt us.
I know I am supposed to forgive,
but it is hard to forget,
little by little acts of hurt whittle a person down.
I feel very vulnerable today, Lord
I feel that anger and loneliness in my heart.
Sometimes, do you feel like that?
I do.
So, I did what I only knew what I could do.
I had a prayer time.
"Stay grateful and enjoy the fullness of God's plan."
Pray:
Please guide me what to do.
Please help me to hear You.
And this is what He said...
Jesus began to show grief and distress of mind and was deeply distressed. Matthew w26:37
He told his BEST FRIENDS that
"My soul is very sad and deeply grieved, so that I am almost dying of sorrow.
Stay here and keep awake and keep watch with Me."
His closest people didn't get it!
He was alone in sorrow and knowledge of the agony to come.
After prayer, He comes back only to find His disciples asleep!
How depressing and isolating!
Going through this torture of His soul,
and
NO ONE there to stay awake and share His burden!
The third time,
looking for support from them,
they were still asleep!
He didn't even bother to wake them this time!
He must have felt so alone.
Going through this mental and spiritual anguish.
He returns to His disciples.
"Are you still sleeping?"
They had NO ABILITY to stay awake,
NO CONCEPT of His anguish.
He was even about to be abandoned by His beloved Peter.
He was EMBRACED and KISSED by the very person who was handing Him over to His killers!
"Hail, greetings, good health to You, long life to You Master!" v.56
All those who LOVED HIM, followed Him,
were now those who deserted Him, fleeing and escaping!
People witnessed against Him.
They misinterpreted His words and meanings to condemn Him.
CONDEMNED HIM!
Spit in His face,
Struck Him,
Punched Him,
and slapped Him in the face.
Misinterpreting anything He would say.
He was denied by His beloved Peter.
"I DO NOT KNOW HIM!
Pilate knew that it was envy and jealousy that caused the leaders to hand Jesus over to Him. Matthew v.27:18
Pilate, the one person who could have kept the people from Jesus, out of self preservation,
washed his hands in the presence of the crowd,
saying,
"I am not guilty of, nor responsible for this righteous Man's blood, see to it yourselves."
He threw Jesus to the wolves: threw him 'under the bus' to preserve himself.
Matthew 27:26 He had Him whipped!
A BATTALION of mocking soldiers gathered around Him!
with evil intent, vicious, vengeful with bloodlust, for sport!
They stripped off His clothing and mocked Him with a robe of dignity and office.
They put a painful crown of thorns into His head,
and completed the mockery with a staff.
Then they KNELT before Him!
Mocking Him, making sport of Him, saying,
"Hail, good health, long life to you!"
And they Matthew 27:30
SPIT on Him,
took the staff from Him and hit him on the head with it!
After they offered Him gall to drink, (further mockery) and crucified Him,
they CAST LOTS to see who would win His only possessions!
Matthew 27:43 Mocked by the leaders,
"He trusts in God,
let God deliver Him
IF God cares for Him!
Crucified with two others (robbers) they mocked Him as well!
Even those who were in the same position were mocking Him! Lowest of low! Matthew 27:44
He was a reject, even among the rejected!
Matthew 27:46 "MY GOD, MY GOD, why have you abandoned Me?
Leaving Me helpless, forsaking and failing Me in My need?"
Matthew 27:49 Those around watching said, "Let's see if Elijah will come to save Him."
Compounding the feeling of abandonment.
Elijah did not come.
When Jesus died, the earth shook and trembled.
Matthew 27:54 Those who were keeping watch were terribly frightened and filled with awe and then said,
TRULY THIS WAS GOD's SON!
___________________________________________________________________________
I thought to myself,
'This hasn't really changed anything for me in the way of circumstances in life.'
Yet, somehow, I feel relieved, at peace.
I feel understood.
I thought, how funny.
I haven't really gotten any answers.
What I have gotten is an insight into the fact that 'He gets me'!
He has been there!
Sometimes we go through an agony that our loved ones 'can't get',
they don't understand,
they don't know.
He understands, and He has been through it!
I am not alone.
Not defeated.
HE IS RISEN.
He has gone through what you are going through.
HE KNOWS YOUR PAIN!
There is hope.
You are NOT alone.
I lift that up to you.
I can hardly hear You.
I feel like I can't hear you!!
I am tired of feeling like I am not important.
And yet I don't understand these feelings because I know I have so many blessings in my life.
Ever feel like that??
I have.
God is not a God of hopelessness.
Even if He does not change a situation,
He can change us.
This is most certainly true.
"He who is kind to the poor,
lends to the Lord, and He will reward him for what he has done." Proverbs 19:17
Being kind and loving without reservation does seem to make moments sweeter for people in the middle
of a crisis.
Lord, I could use some kindness.
I am tired Lord.
Yet I feel like a spoiled brat because I have so much.
Sometimes people hurt us.
I know I am supposed to forgive,
but it is hard to forget,
little by little acts of hurt whittle a person down.
I feel very vulnerable today, Lord
I feel that anger and loneliness in my heart.
Sometimes, do you feel like that?
I do.
So, I did what I only knew what I could do.
I had a prayer time.
"Stay grateful and enjoy the fullness of God's plan."
Pray:
Please guide me what to do.
Please help me to hear You.
And this is what He said...
Jesus began to show grief and distress of mind and was deeply distressed. Matthew w26:37
He told his BEST FRIENDS that
"My soul is very sad and deeply grieved, so that I am almost dying of sorrow.
Stay here and keep awake and keep watch with Me."
His closest people didn't get it!
He was alone in sorrow and knowledge of the agony to come.
After prayer, He comes back only to find His disciples asleep!
How depressing and isolating!
Going through this torture of His soul,
and
NO ONE there to stay awake and share His burden!
The third time,
looking for support from them,
they were still asleep!
He didn't even bother to wake them this time!
He must have felt so alone.
Going through this mental and spiritual anguish.
He returns to His disciples.
"Are you still sleeping?"
They had NO ABILITY to stay awake,
NO CONCEPT of His anguish.
He was even about to be abandoned by His beloved Peter.
He was EMBRACED and KISSED by the very person who was handing Him over to His killers!
"Hail, greetings, good health to You, long life to You Master!" v.56
All those who LOVED HIM, followed Him,
were now those who deserted Him, fleeing and escaping!
People witnessed against Him.
They misinterpreted His words and meanings to condemn Him.
CONDEMNED HIM!
Spit in His face,
Struck Him,
Punched Him,
and slapped Him in the face.
Misinterpreting anything He would say.
He was denied by His beloved Peter.
"I DO NOT KNOW HIM!
Pilate knew that it was envy and jealousy that caused the leaders to hand Jesus over to Him. Matthew v.27:18
Pilate, the one person who could have kept the people from Jesus, out of self preservation,
washed his hands in the presence of the crowd,
saying,
"I am not guilty of, nor responsible for this righteous Man's blood, see to it yourselves."
He threw Jesus to the wolves: threw him 'under the bus' to preserve himself.
Matthew 27:26 He had Him whipped!
A BATTALION of mocking soldiers gathered around Him!
with evil intent, vicious, vengeful with bloodlust, for sport!
They stripped off His clothing and mocked Him with a robe of dignity and office.
They put a painful crown of thorns into His head,
and completed the mockery with a staff.
Then they KNELT before Him!
Mocking Him, making sport of Him, saying,
"Hail, good health, long life to you!"
And they Matthew 27:30
SPIT on Him,
took the staff from Him and hit him on the head with it!
After they offered Him gall to drink, (further mockery) and crucified Him,
they CAST LOTS to see who would win His only possessions!
Matthew 27:43 Mocked by the leaders,
"He trusts in God,
let God deliver Him
IF God cares for Him!
Crucified with two others (robbers) they mocked Him as well!
Even those who were in the same position were mocking Him! Lowest of low! Matthew 27:44
He was a reject, even among the rejected!
Matthew 27:46 "MY GOD, MY GOD, why have you abandoned Me?
Leaving Me helpless, forsaking and failing Me in My need?"
Matthew 27:49 Those around watching said, "Let's see if Elijah will come to save Him."
Compounding the feeling of abandonment.
Elijah did not come.
When Jesus died, the earth shook and trembled.
Matthew 27:54 Those who were keeping watch were terribly frightened and filled with awe and then said,
TRULY THIS WAS GOD's SON!
___________________________________________________________________________
I thought to myself,
'This hasn't really changed anything for me in the way of circumstances in life.'
Yet, somehow, I feel relieved, at peace.
I feel understood.
I thought, how funny.
I haven't really gotten any answers.
What I have gotten is an insight into the fact that 'He gets me'!
He has been there!
Sometimes we go through an agony that our loved ones 'can't get',
they don't understand,
they don't know.
He understands, and He has been through it!
I am not alone.
Not defeated.
HE IS RISEN.
He has gone through what you are going through.
HE KNOWS YOUR PAIN!
There is hope.
You are NOT alone.
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