Ever feel like you just want to cry, alone, rejected, ridiculed, unloved, depressed?

Lord, sometimes I feel depressed and want to cry and want everyone to leave me alone.
I lift that up to you.
I can hardly hear You.
I feel like I can't hear you!!
I am tired of feeling like I am not important.
And yet I don't understand these feelings because I know I have so many blessings in my life.

Ever feel like that??
I have.

God is not a God of hopelessness.
Even if He does not change a situation,
He can change us.
This is most certainly true.

"He who is kind to the poor,
lends to the Lord, and He will reward him for what he has done."  Proverbs 19:17
Being kind and loving without reservation does seem to make moments sweeter for people in the middle
of a crisis.
Lord, I could use some kindness.
I am tired Lord.
Yet I feel like a spoiled brat because I have so much.

Sometimes people hurt us.
I know I am supposed to forgive,
but it is hard to forget,
little by little acts of hurt whittle a person down.
I feel very vulnerable today, Lord
I feel that anger and loneliness in my heart.

Sometimes, do you feel like that?
I do.
So, I did what I only knew what I could do.
I had a prayer time.

"Stay grateful and enjoy the fullness of God's plan."

Pray:
Please guide me what to do.
Please help me to hear You.

And this is what He said...

Jesus began to show grief and distress of mind and was deeply distressed.  Matthew w26:37
He told his BEST FRIENDS that
"My soul is very sad and deeply grieved, so that I am almost dying of sorrow.
Stay here and keep awake and keep watch with Me."
His closest people didn't get it!
He was alone in sorrow and knowledge of the agony to come.
After prayer, He comes back only to find His disciples asleep!
How depressing and isolating!
Going through this torture of His soul,
and
NO ONE there to stay awake and share His burden!
The third time,
looking for support from them,
they were still asleep!
He didn't even bother to wake them this time!
He must have felt so alone.
Going through this mental and spiritual anguish.
He returns to His disciples.
"Are you still sleeping?"
They had NO ABILITY to stay awake, 
NO CONCEPT of His anguish.
He was even about to be abandoned by His beloved Peter.

He was EMBRACED and KISSED by the very person who was handing Him over to His killers!
"Hail, greetings, good health to You, long life to You Master!" v.56

All those who LOVED HIM, followed Him,
were now those who deserted Him, fleeing and escaping!

People witnessed against Him.
They misinterpreted His words and meanings to condemn Him.
CONDEMNED HIM!
Spit in His face,
Struck Him,
Punched Him,
and slapped Him in the face.
Misinterpreting anything He would say.

He was denied by His beloved Peter.
"I DO NOT KNOW HIM!

Pilate knew that it was envy and jealousy that caused the leaders to hand Jesus over to Him. Matthew v.27:18
Pilate, the one person who could have kept the people from Jesus, out of self preservation,
washed his hands in the presence of the crowd,
saying,
"I am not guilty of, nor responsible for this righteous Man's blood, see to it yourselves."
He threw Jesus to the wolves: threw him 'under the bus' to preserve himself.

Matthew 27:26 He had Him whipped!

A BATTALION of mocking soldiers gathered around Him!
with evil intent, vicious, vengeful with bloodlust, for sport!
They stripped off His clothing and mocked Him with a robe of dignity and office.
They put a painful crown of thorns into His head,
and completed the mockery with a staff.
Then they KNELT before Him!
Mocking Him, making sport of Him, saying,
"Hail, good health, long life to you!"
And they Matthew 27:30
SPIT on Him,
took the staff from Him and hit him on the head with it!
After they offered Him gall to drink, (further mockery) and crucified Him,
they CAST LOTS to see who would win His only possessions!
Matthew 27:43  Mocked by the leaders,
"He trusts in God,
let God deliver Him
IF God cares for Him!

Crucified with two others (robbers) they mocked Him as well!
Even those who were in the same position were mocking Him!  Lowest of low! Matthew 27:44
He was a reject, even among the rejected!

Matthew 27:46  "MY GOD, MY GOD, why have you abandoned Me?
Leaving Me helpless, forsaking and failing Me in My need?"

Matthew 27:49  Those around watching said, "Let's see if Elijah will come to save Him."
Compounding the feeling of abandonment.
Elijah did not come.

When Jesus died, the earth shook and trembled.
Matthew 27:54 Those who were keeping watch were terribly frightened and filled with awe and then said,

TRULY THIS WAS GOD's SON!
___________________________________________________________________________

 I thought to myself,
'This hasn't really changed anything for me in the way of circumstances in life.'
Yet, somehow, I feel relieved, at peace.
I feel understood.
I thought, how funny.
I haven't really gotten any answers.
What I have gotten is an insight into the fact that 'He gets me'!
He has been there!
Sometimes we go through an agony that our loved ones 'can't get',
they don't understand,
they don't know.

He understands, and He has been through it!
I am not alone.
Not defeated.


HE IS RISEN.
He has gone through what you are going through.
HE KNOWS YOUR PAIN!

There is hope.
You are NOT alone.

Women set there desire on men. They have turned to them to gain their approval, to be found acceptable, worthy, admired, and chosen.

When you come to Me,
and I give you that eternal life,
I give to all who believe in Me,
It alters your whole existence,
the words you speak, 
the influences you have. -God Calling

We believe in You and yet so much of us still needs Your healing redemption.
We want to reflect You but we have so much to learn.

You must ponder on the truths I give you.
Meditate on them.  -God Calling 

Whatever we set our desire on will rule us.
You have only to look around you to see how women,
even Christian women set there desire on men.
They have turned to them to gain their approval,
to be found acceptable, worthy, admired, and chosen.
As a result they are ruled by them.
They take their cues for life from them.
Whatever women believe the male race wants,
they will try to become.
A women still today has unspoken expectations that the man she has chosen will meet all her needs for security, purpose, worth and identity.
What a huge disappointment when this self centered dream is not realized.
When the woman's husband is not able to fill up the "grand canyon" inside of her.
Ultimately her hurt and disillusionment will set in,
followed by anger and then bitterness.
A great chasm will develop between them.
It will take divine surgery to heal it.    -Jane Hansen.

You are the Divine Surgeon.

Why do you look at the speck in the other's eye, but do not see the plank in your own eye.  -Matt. 3

Focus on what other's do right,
you are responsible for your own actions,
not everyone else's.

Be calm.
no matter what happens.

Rest in Me.
Be patient,
and let patience have it's perfect work.
ever think things overwhelming.
How can you be overwhelmed when I am with you?
Do not feel the strain of life.
There is no strain for My children.
The strain is only when you are serving another master,
the world, fame, the good opinion of people
or carrying two days burden on one day. -God Calling

Give us wisdom for the way.
Draw close to God and He will draw close to you. - James 4:8

Spending time with God is crucial for us in order to change and move ahead.
Apart from God we are stuck in old lies,
old habits, old unhealthy relationships.

How can we spend quality and quantity time with God?
It's almost like having a lover that you have to figure out how to secretly meet with in the middle of a chaos.
You have to actively think about him and want him.

I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in Hid word I put my hope.  -Psalm 130:5

Sometimes we don't have the emotional equipment or courage to deal with certain situation's in our life.
We pray You into the situation and You give us illumination, direction, strength.

As a doe longs for running streams, so longs my soul for You, Oh Lord.

MARRIAGE
Lord please help us to focus on all the thing that our spouse does right.
Remind us that we are responsible only for our own actions.
I am not responsible to correct my spouse.
You have called me to love.
Everyone's journey is different.
It is up to us to keep in shape and travel light.
Beware the barrenness of a busy life.

Kindness is essential in winning anyone's heart.

There is a spiritual battle to be consistently kind in my own home.

Give us the grace to be loving and kind.
Help us to focus on You.

I tend to wander amidst the conflicting pulls of my life.

You have promised that You will guide me and direct me on my daily path.

Because of His love for me,
He warns me in His word and through the grieving within me of His Spirit.
This gives me a sense of security that He has guard rails for life's journey.

Lord make me sensitive to Your voice.

I just snapped! I had cabin fever!

Still in my PJ's , no make up, no curled hair, didn't have my prayer time. Stressed out.
Clean up, mess up, clean up, mess up, stress!
I snapped.

Thank you Lord that we can apologize.

My guidance is often by shut doors.
Life with Me is not immunity from the difficulties,
but peace in the difficulties.
Joy is the result of faithful trusting acceptance of My Will.
When it seems not joyous.
Joy is the result of calm. -God Calling

Learning to live with repetitious dirtiness.
I am thankful for these days.
Let this be a time of blessing for those around me.
Help us to share You!
With each other.
If feel like a failure when I lose my cool.
I feel like I am supposed to be 'saintlier' then that.
Help me to be able to accept Your grace and power in my weakness.
Thank You that I can apologize.
I do not  'strain to reach the end of the race'   -Phil 3:14.
I long to be a light of You and Your love in the present,
IN the race.

He lets me rest in green meadows,
He leads me besides peaceful streams.  Psalm 23:2

In our lives it is so hard to find a moments silence.
Look along the path for the quiet place.
Look away from the Internet and the crowd.
Look in your home.
Create a quiet place in your home.
Look at your schedule.

Frankly, both of us are kind of strange, neither of us in perfect.

"Continue these prayer times even if they seem fruitless."
Lord it seems like having this prayer time is getting harder for some reason.

Go back to a sincere and devoted commitment to God.  
Be honest, seek help,
Ask for prayer.

Be careful.
Watch out for attacks from your enemy.
He prowls around like a roaring lion,
looking for some victim to devour.  1 Peter 5:8

Fix your thoughts and eyes on God.

MARRIAGE:
Help us to love our spouses unconditionally,
just as You love us.
Frankly, both of us are kind of strange, neither of us in perfect.
But I am committed to you.
Love is an unconditional commitment to an imperfect person.
Guide us Lord,
we are weak, but You are strong.
Guide us with Your powerful hand.

YOU MUST PRAY.
The way will open.
God cares and His plans unfold.
Just love and wait.
Love is the key.
No door is too difficult for it to open.
Why do you fear?
He has cared for and protected you.
Hope on.
With certainty.
Be calm in My Power.
Never Neglect these times.
Pray and Read your bible and train and discipline yourself.
That is your work-
Mine is to use you.
But My instruments must be sharp and ready.
Then I use them.
All harmful thoughts must be turned out.
See how necessary I have made the purity and goodness of your own lives to you.
Soon you shall ask and at once it will come.
Welcome the training.
Do not worry about others lives.
You must perfect yourselves first in My strength.
Silently I come.
No man can judge when it enters the heart of another person.
Listen quietly.
Sometimes you may get no message.
Meet all the same.
You will absorb an atmosphere.
Each word or thought of yours can be like a pearl that you drop into the secret place of another heart,
and in some hour of need,
the recipient finds the treasure and realizes for the first time its value.
Do not be too ready to do,
just be.
Individual effort gains nothing.
It is only the work of My Spirit that counts.
Dwell more on this.  -God Calling